Skyrim is filled with mysteries. How come this region the size of a city has several climates? How can all the guards know something you did even though none of them saw it? How come all the races have these thick accents except for the Nords, who speak normally? Hello, I am Kilian Experience, and I have solved the biggest mystery. In an interview with Todd Howard, he was asked what he wanted to keep in Skyrim that got cut. "I wanted the player to be able to visit Elsweyr because I really, really like cats, "but then we were asked to remove it by Daniel, the fuckface in UI. "Because he is allergic. "An alpha is still in the game. "Doubt you would be able to find it unless you are a genius, like YouTube content creator Kilian Experience." That last sentence inspired me to try, so I searched all of Skyrim. No, really.
All of it. Is Elsweyr under this basket? No. But I finally found it. Start the Civil War quest as the Empire, then lose. Their enemy's stupid religion will spread to a certain region and the Empire will send you there to stop it from spreading even more. And that, is finally how you unlock Elder Scrolls: Vietnam! [rock music plays] It's obviously still in alpha. I heard a guy hang himself in the jungle, I went to check and he was just standing there.
I'm roleplaying he's a ghost! Weapons and nature is done, but tons of skooma dens. Lots of drugged-up cats. And scantily clad cats. What the fuck? Horrible.
But nothing compared to the horrors I've seen here. The Vietnam alpha is hell. I've seen kittens getting shot in the head, and refuse to die. I mean, they are super annoying. I've seen multiple unfixable crashes. By now, I don't even know if it's because of the alpha or it's just Skyrim being Skyrim. And when I return home to Whiterun, they call me a baby killer, a mass murderer, and ask if I get to the Cloud District very often.
Sometimes, I wish I would just die here, so I don't have to live with what I have seen. But I hope you liked this guide on finding Elsweyr! Which I realise now, I never actually found. So I completely wasted your time. And that is the Kilian Experience.