Have you ever watched the Dota 2 Trailer and thought to yourself... man, the star of this trailer isn't some bullshit hero it's the shopkeeper! SHOPKEEPER: Hello, I am the shopkeeper. I've put a lot of effort into concealing my true identity for I am the god of this war. This is because the heroes don't decide this battle of the ancients. I DO.
You think the heroes are hot shit!? What's an Antimage without his Battlefury? What's a Spectre without her Radiance? What good is any hero at all without any form of boots? Nothing. You're all jack shit without me. Let's start the show.
CHECK THIS OUT What the hell happens when you take a Headdress, a Morbid Mask, a recipe, and a Ring of Basilius you ask? Well... You put them together and you get a resulting item that looks reasonably like these items if they were put together The ring is kind of pushing it but F*** OFF Next, we have your boots of travel. How do you make THAT shit? Well, you get yourself some regular old normie boots and then, and THIS is the thing, you get a recipe. Focus on reading the recipe, up and down, learn it backwards and forwards and forwards and backwards OH SHIT you got boots of travel. Who knew that all you needed to invent teleportation was to write some shit on a piece of paper. Wow. Maybe it would make more sense to combine a teleport scroll with boots or something but whatever the recipe costs more so hell yeah, profits! Next up: You got your Yasha. You got your Sange.
For this next item I've brought in an assistant. Gyrocopter. GYRO: Slowly move the Sange and the Yasha closer together. almost... aaand there! Together they create the fabled Dota 2 item: The Really Big Pair of Scissors of Yashasange.
SHOPKEEPER: U C DAT SHIT!? So many great items in Dota 2 one more item for today. Look at these: You see what these are? Hyperstones. Impressive, yes? NO! This is not impressive! Make a Hyperstone sandwich and wow holy shit IT'S a MOONSHARD It has literally become a chunk of the moon! I have created that which is from another celestial body That in the lore, blew up, and is where the Radiant and the Dire come from ..or some shit. but holy hell, I made it with my hands! That's all for this edition. Until next time, I'm your god. Buy my shit or you'll die.